Less Lazy, More Yummy - Apple Danish

I know I recently made an apple post, but this recipe blows that one out of the water, and is much more versatile in its uses. The last recipe is for when you're lazy and it's late. This recipe is for when you are going to bitch-slap breakfast into next week.

I get apples a lot when I dumpster. Many grocery stores will throw out a whole bag of apples when only one is bruised, wasting up to 10 good apples. I say, why let one bad apple ruin the bunch? There's a lot of creative things you can do with them (apple chips, chutney, apple butter, juice, applesauce, adding cheese/peanut butter for a snack, etc - you'll definitely see more renditions of what to do with apples in the future).

Given all the apple options, making something sweet is kind of a cop-out, and generally unhealthy. Plus, apple desserts rely on using many of your pantry ingredients (which last almost forever) for comparatively few dumpstered ones (a bad ratio for the dumpster diver or penny saver).

Still, this shit's delicious. It's way better than any danish I've gotten at the store. You can eat it for breakfast on-the-go, a snack, or dessert for a large dinner party or pot luck (I'm saving mine for an upcoming road trip). This recipe makes a full 11" x 17" pan of danish, so it'll last you a long time, which is nice, considering it takes about an hour to make. Just pop it in the toaster oven to reheat.

APPLE DANISH

Ingredients:

Crust (you can buy pre-made pastry crust, too):
- 3 cups flour
- 1 tsp salt
- 1 cup shortening (I used vegetable shortening, but butter is fine too).
- 1/2 cup milk
- 1 egg yolk, beaten (If you don't know how to separate eggs, let an adorable French man in this video teach you how) - make sure to keep the egg white for later.

Filling:
- Around 6 cups thinly sliced, peeled, & cored granny smith apples (I think I used 6 granny smiths and 1.5 gala apples).
- 1/2 cup sugar
- 2 tbsp flour
- 1 tsp cinnamon
- Sprinkle of nutmeg
- 1/4 cup butter
- 1 egg white, beaten

Glaze (Optional):
- 1.5 cups powdered sugar
- 1/8 tsp salt
- 1-2 tsp vanilla (put in one, then if it tastes too sugary, add another splash)
- 3 tbsp milk

For Crust:
Mix flour, salt, cut in shortening (I used a pastry cutter, but a whisk or fork will work fine).
Combine milk and egg yolk and add to flour mixture.
Roll out half the mixture on an 11 x 17 inch pan (Now, I don't have a rolling pin, but this doesn't stop me from being a pastry mama - you can use anything round to roll out your crust - I used a to-go coffee mug. In the past I've used wine or beer bottles too).

For Filling:
Arrange apples evenly in the crust, like this:
Combine sugar, flour, cinnamon, and nutmeg, then sprinkle over the apples.
Dot evenly with butter.

Roll out remaining pastry and place it over the cinnamon mixture. A cool, easy way to do this is to roll out the crust on saran wrap (which is the same width as your pan anyway), then just flip the whole thing over on top of your pastry and lift up the saran wrap.

Next, brush pastry with egg white - be careful not to let it pool up anywhere or else you'll get a cooked egg part, which tastes really funky and looks ugly.

Bake at 375 degrees for 45 minutes.

For (Optional) Glaze:
Mix the powdered sugar, salt, vanilla and milk together.
Spread on warm Apple Danish.

So, here it is without glaze:
And with:
Garnish with fresh or cooked apple if you're feeling feisty and want to show off:
IF YOU GLAZE THIS, KEEP IT REFRIGERATED SO IT LASTS.

p.s. I know this is so wrong, but my cat liked it too:
Items not dumpstered or donated (A LOT. Darn.): Flour, salt, shortening, sugar, powdered sugar, milk, butter, cinnamon, nutmeg, egg, salt, vanilla